An Open Letter to My Son because I owe him a public apology.
I saw that popular post about mean mothers and didn’t post it because I was so much worse than that. I’m not sorry. But I am sorry that you felt your childhood was so hard.
Remember when you were going into high school and although you loved being a percussionist you refused to be a marching band geek? And I made you “join” something? You chose JROTC because it was a little less embarrassing. I’m not sorry. But I am sorry that you felt I was taking control of your life from you.
Remember when I dragged you to church every Sunday? And made you go to Catholic school and be an altar server? I’m not sorry. But I am sorry you felt I took an important choice from you.
Remember when you let all your grades slip except JROTC EVERY OTHER interim? And you were grounded from everything until you brought them back up? I’m not sorry. But I am sorry you felt that meant I didn’t care what you went without.
Remember when you were in military college, cold, without sleep for days, and your computer crashed losing an important assignment? And I told you if you quit, don’t come home? I’m not sorry. But I am sorry you felt abandoned and had no where to turn.
Everything you endured, every fight you fought and won, every time you hated your mother you became more of what you are. You became a cadet who walked five miles on a broken foot rather than quit and you became one of the youngest officers of your rank in this country. You also became a wise and intelligent adult who has a depth of understanding of the people he meets from every walk of life.
I hope in your wisdom you can recognize how much easier it would have been for your mother to say, “I’m sorry. My baby shouldn’t have to suffer, just quit “.
Love, your proud and horrible mother.
P.S. I am sorry I tease you about things like your $85 shirts, what I mean to say is, “Wow, my son can afford a dryer full of $85 shirts!”
Musings & Meaning 